Time flies..
Received my promotion and bonus letter today. Have mixed feelings abt it.. feeling both excited and happy yet depressed to a certain extent. Cos during the past year, i have gained a lot and also lost a lot..

I've gained in terms of getting to know and work with nice colleagues, the accounting knowledge, the valuable working experience and not forgetting the money earned.

Lost quite a fair bit too. Like my health, sleep, time for my family, friends and myself. Money cant buy all of these. So i'm not sure if it's a good thing to get promoted. Cos i know that with the promotion, i will lose more of those.

It has been quite some time since my previous post. Friends have been msg-ing me to ask how am i and also if i managed to visit a doctor. Friends, thanks for the concern. Really appreciate, however i'm still not ready to share what i'm going through. Never even have the courage to tell my parents, afraid to make them worry. I dun want to be a burden to them and i dun wanna let them down.

Sad to say, i haven seen the doctor. Everyday, when i can go home early, i will tell myself that maybe i should just step into the clinic. But everytime, i ended up hesitating in front of the clinic and decided to just take a bus back home. So sometimes, i would rather stay in the office till late, so that i dun have the time for the negative thoughts.

On the outside, i might look strong and tough. But inside me, it is totally the opposite. I would try to be happy everyday, cos nobody knows what lies tomorrow..* my dreams_ 11:16 PM

.........
i'm getting worried.. worried for my health.

I can sense that something is real wrong, but i just dun wanna and scared to face the reality.

Feeling undecided abt seeing a doctor. Haiz..

Rather emotional today. My tears was rolled down very easily today.. when i was waiting for the bus and also when listening to a song by Cai MinYou on campus superstar. Direct translation of the song name is "I can do it".

Hmm.. i really not sure if i can do it. Maybe it's just my fate. What to do..* my dreams_ 10:42 PM

Life updates.. =)
hmm.. it has been a month since i last blogged. Nothing much happened during that month.

One on of the fridays, i attended AABS22 post peak chill out session at St James Power Station. It was my first time there.. quite an eyeopener cos i seldom go to such places to club/pub. Music and the drinks there were cool. Haha.. saw some of my colleagues got drunk. The feeling must be real terrible. All vomiting and dizziness. oohh.. luckily i can hold my liqour quite well, must be the dad's genes. Really wanna to go there again to chill out.

Oh yes, recently i invested in the gym membership at Fitness First. Main purpose is to lose weight of course. My second priority is to be healthier. Ever since i started working, i really feel that my health is deteriorating. All the late nights, early mornings and irregular meals. So i hope that with that exercising, i can get back my health. Also, i realised it does helped to take my mind off work, esp when attending their lessons.

They have lots of classes e.g BodyCombat, BodyStep, BodyJam, Fitball and B.U.T.T camp etc. My fav is BodyCombat. There's a lot of karate moves and i can kick and box my way through. Good way to vent my frustration at work.

Attended my first bodyjam class today. It's more of a dance class then a workout class. A lot of dance movements have been choreographed to work out the muscles while dancing. It was a total disaster for me cos it's first time "dancing". Real bad hands and legs coordination i must say. Nevertheless, it was enjoyable and fun!! Enjoyed every moment, though i know i looked totally clumsy. Gonna attend more lessons to brush up the skills. haha..

So friends remember to jio me along for gym workouts.* my dreams_ 10:57 PM