Time flies..
Received my promotion and bonus letter today. Have mixed feelings abt it.. feeling both excited and happy yet depressed to a certain extent. Cos during the past year, i have gained a lot and also lost a lot..

I've gained in terms of getting to know and work with nice colleagues, the accounting knowledge, the valuable working experience and not forgetting the money earned.

Lost quite a fair bit too. Like my health, sleep, time for my family, friends and myself. Money cant buy all of these. So i'm not sure if it's a good thing to get promoted. Cos i know that with the promotion, i will lose more of those.

It has been quite some time since my previous post. Friends have been msg-ing me to ask how am i and also if i managed to visit a doctor. Friends, thanks for the concern. Really appreciate, however i'm still not ready to share what i'm going through. Never even have the courage to tell my parents, afraid to make them worry. I dun want to be a burden to them and i dun wanna let them down.

Sad to say, i haven seen the doctor. Everyday, when i can go home early, i will tell myself that maybe i should just step into the clinic. But everytime, i ended up hesitating in front of the clinic and decided to just take a bus back home. So sometimes, i would rather stay in the office till late, so that i dun have the time for the negative thoughts.

On the outside, i might look strong and tough. But inside me, it is totally the opposite. I would try to be happy everyday, cos nobody knows what lies tomorrow..* my dreams_ 11:16 PM